"Suppose to Be" Land"

I’ve written a couple of times about my daughter, Selah and her sleeping (or rather not sleeping) through the night. As I’ve said before, my older daughter, Arowyn slept through the night at four and a half weeks. Selah sleeps through the night on occasion. What has absolutely floored me is the fact that nearly every time she does sleep through the night…something either wakes me up or I have to be up half the night for another reason. Are you starting to suspect God of something yet…it’s okay if you aren’t…took me 14 months to figure it out.

About a week ago, I was contemplating the state of my house, my car, my children, and my mind thinking pray/complaining to the Lord “If Selah would only sleep through the night I could get caught up on…”

Translation~ IT’S NOT SUPPOSE TO BE THIS WAY!

I cannot tell you how much trouble my emotional and mental clinging to that sentence has caused in my life. It’s a peace-killing, hope-stealing, life-sucking parasite that creeps in and wraps its nasty self around my heart. And like Jr. Asparagus’ fib…it grows casting other thoughts in its dark shadow.

A long time ago I realize something amazing and life changing. Where I am at this moment, circumstances and all, is EXACTLY where God wants me to be. And while in it, I have the opportunity to bring honor and glory to him by first and foremost submitting with a thankful heart to where I’m AT. But I forget to revisit that thought from time to time.

So, where am I at with Selah? I’m TIRED but there are still things that God is calling me to take care of…with joy no less. Does that mean things are still going to fall apart…yes…but when they do, I’m not going to turn to God with an excuse on my lips, “Well, the serpent beguiled me and I did eat.” Or “Well, Selah kept me up last night, so I…” Whatever the thing I’m letting myself be lazy about because I’m not getting the sleep I think I need!  

I’m very grateful to the Lord for revealing this when he did…it has helped me put this weekend in perspective when I’d rather stand up in my own little world screaming my former mantra. How much easier to look into the face of LOVE and realize, it’s the place, the relationships, the situation God himself has placed me, and in it I have all the power available to me to proceed rightly and obediently and boldly. How do I know? I’ll share that in part 2.

In the meantime…Can you think of an area of your life you’ve subtitled “supposed to be”? Sighs and wistfulness are wonderful “suppose to be” detectors. Do you have another detector you can share?