Red at Christmas...

I used to hate the color "red" normally associated with Christmas. I don't mean dislike or prefer another color...I mean out and out HATE the red most readily found in this festive season. It broadcast to me the sad existence of the tacky and kitchy side of "Merry Christmas". I mean really, you need look no further than our modern day "Santa" to wonder why.

That bright, in-your-face hue reminds me of thick, puffy vinyl ribbon, fuzzy on one side, slick on the other, invoking a sense of phony festivity...almost like those 70's costumes. I'm sorry, but a plastic mask of Tinker Bell doesn't make you look any more like the green winged fairy than a fancy bow on a new vacuum cleaner makes it look like a maid. (analogy in progress :)

But this year, I cast aside my aversion with barely a raised brow. Decorating began with some shiny red and gold ornaments my husband found last year in a Pier 1 dumpster (our favorite place to pick up items for only the gas it costs us in between striking out and striking it big searching in the back alleyways of our local strip malls! I used to be ashamed...until I realized God was decorating my house...and he did pretty good with creation (hyperbole in case you didn't catch it :), so I'm okay with Rick diving in, feet sticking out, waving a hand for me to get out of the car and help!)

Now red, by the very nature of it's crisp, bold essence, should only be used as an accent. (can I reference creation again?) Despite my aversion, I've seen it beautifully crowded in by white and natural decorations of all kinds, from baking ornaments to candy wrapping to animal treats (pet shop of course). So, I choose this year to use its presence to allow me to simplify my trimming the tree approach . Thanks to said approach, I let go of the elaborate ribbons and frustrating fake snow I spent hours in previous years trying to achieve a look that was "just so".

The result? I've learned to embrace the red in my decorating. It no longer represents something garish and tacky, but inviting and warm. It represents something more too. Change. Hope. Love. Submission. The power found in submitting to a designed and greater, more perfect will than my own...

You see, many times we find broken pieces in our beloved dumpster of choice. Shattered, would-have-been treasures that have fallen (sometimes literally) victim to either a careless turn in a tight space, or an unrestrained child whose mother really should have known better before entering the store.~I speak from experience~ But this set of red and gold ornaments was in perfect condition, other than its clear plastic container which could no longer hold them perfectly together.

My first instinct? Toss 'em . Get rid of them when Rick's not looking. Really, do you think he'd remember? Probably not.

Second instinct? Sell 'em. Rick wouldn't mind that...

But almost a year as passed since "the find". A year where so much has happened, and so much hasn't happened.

My biological father is no longer a shadowed figure, fighting with my mommy through the screened porch, his ginormous Afro haloed in the sunshine behind him. He has a face, tanned and wrinkled, and lips I'd guessed at because mine are so very different from my mother's.

I've been stretched these past 12 months in ways I've not appreciated initially. Physically, this once friend proclaimed "midget barbie doll" of a frame sees evidence of "the fall" every time I get out of bed. Mentally, I've learned along side Arowyn Latin, skip counting, American history and so much more that I never had any interest in before. Spiritually, I look at Philippians with a whole new perspective and weep every time I read it. Career wise, that three book contract I just knew would come ~ and in all fairness a certain big publisher made it seem likely~  make all my hopes and expectations come true ~ well, even though there's still some wood in the fire ~ I'm not pinning the validation for my existence on it anymore.

And then there's my family...they have suffered loss, trial after trial this past year. Begging the question..."WHAT are you doing, LORD?" The returning answer, "Wait for it."...

Yes, there has been change...in me and the world around me. Red seems to suit the change. God knew that last year. I'm glad I let Him be God in this, and just went with it. Because by centering on this one tiny, altered view of a primary color, my imagination warms to wonder at possibilities beyond my timid acceptance of a hue previously thought detestable...I LIKE that!

Have a Merry Christmas!